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Post by big little brother on Feb 5, 2006 7:22:17 GMT -5
As I wandered about the resort meeting various feat fans, I quickly discovered that I was lacking in "feat credentials" and furthermore discovered, along with a case of Jamaican induced giggles, that after 35 years I was still the little brother, too young to have caught any early feat shows, but having been born in the 50's (barely), still a baby boomer.
My older sister calls me her "big little brother", the "big" part of the handle referencing my 6' 7" 285 lb body.
Thus the choice of "big little brother" as my forum handle. So next year in Negril, when you see me wandering about with my lovely 5'-5"auburn haired wife Michele, just call out "hey BLB!" and you will be greeted with a wide smile.
Michele and I stayed on the hill, right behind the Stone House bar. At first slightly disappointed in not buying a beach front room, we soon decided the south end of the resort was absolutely perfect for us as it provided a nice quiet secluded corner.
We very quickly fell into a predictable pattern: Burn some fine Jamaican at the room, wander on down the shore past the lawn chessboard to the beach bar for a Pina Colada, then wander along the shore to the Grand Terraza for food or drink, depending on what was available at the time , then on to a Jamaican break somewhere on the beach, then onward to the far bar for another drink. Rinse and repeat endlessly!
We estimate that it is 2000 feet from the top of the hill to the far bar, so we had a nice rationalization for our high calorie food and booze intake. I estimate we walked the loop four to five times a day, with two of the daily trips continuing down the beach to Antonio's vending stand ("You are talking to the farmah mon! only the sweetest and the best!")
Unlike most of the group, we are early morning people so we missed all of the after show parties, instead stumbling back to our room to crash. For those few that might be interested, the first coffee at the resort shows up at the C.O.B. bar at 5:30AM. As a certified coffee freak, having all the Jamaica Blue Mountain coffee on hand really topped an already over-the-top experience for me.
Speaking of coffee, next year I am hoping to lead or participate in a day trip to the Blue Mountains to visit the Mavis Bank or Wallenford coffee factory. The cruisin' folks are looking into this, and I will be pestering them to make sure it happens! I am told that Tim's airline has an eight passenger ride that can get us to Kingston for a couple hundred per seat. Fellow coffee fanatics keep your eyes and ears and wallets open for this one!
The first day I made a solemn decision. Pina Colada was to be my drink for the day. On the second day I went on a mission. Locate the very best Pina Colada in the resort. The clear winner was Patricia at the Stone House Bar.
Hot tip: Don't miss the couples massage! The whole excursion experience brought on a level of relaxation I thought not possible; the massage left us loose beyond comprehension!
See you around the block! Mike and Michele
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Post by Scott Hays on Feb 7, 2006 14:06:34 GMT -5
Helen and I are also early risers, and the patterns of your behavior matches our pretty closely (though we never made it to Antonio's). We tried the Far Bar after hours on Friday night, but headed back to the room for some reason or another before many people got there, and got caught up in the romance of the moment ... somehow, we never made it back. We planned the Far Bar on Saturday, but ... as stated elsewhere ... it was closed on account of rain, and the crowd in the Grand Terrazo made it almost impossible to get a drink. We hung for a while, as long as our tired eyes would allow, but ended up crashing and burning. Light weights, I know. But hey ... someone's gotta do it so there's room for everyone else.
Sorry that we missed Inara and the crazy energy of Vince .... hopefully some of it will come through on copies of the shows when they get burned and distributed ... but we did see some incredible energy burned by Ron Halloway and Coco!
Shaun's cooking workshop was a marvelously spent hour and a half ... the quick snack at the end was a delicious break from the usual food fare. But there is certainly something to be said for falling out of your room to plates full of food prepared by someone else and an endless supply of rum (or whatever). We did something similar to your Pina Colada search ... we went from bar to bar and asked whoever was there to make us their "best rum drink". Winner was Alvin at the Timber House. He called it a "Jamaican Sunrise" ... and no one else made a drink of that name like he did. Personally, I think they make up stuff but hey ... it's all good and the price was right.
We had no off-campus adventures this year. After last year, we agreed to not leave. However, the group trips ... in hindsight ... seem like a cool thing. A trip to the coffee plantations might be fun. More Billy photo field trips would be really cool, too! We did spend one afternoon down at Rick's place (no sunset cruise on the yacht), and did the glass bottom boat trip with Dave and Doris (and the G-Man!), which was quite intoxicating. Most everyone who came back from that little excursion seemed to have a far-away eyes look to them.
Denny nailed it right on the head for me ... he thinks that everyone who comes has at least one thing in common, and the freedom of Jamaica (not to mention the atmosphere) allows us to explore other commonalities. But we are a family, and the band grows from the energy we give to them.
Well ... they provide me with a lot of energy. So thanks
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mg
Full Member
Posts: 117
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Post by mg on Feb 8, 2006 18:46:27 GMT -5
So far, I have not heard of any entries to "the hankus jamaican escape" contest for 2006.... what's up with that? my ears are to the ground for mythmaking among the feathful. come on folks, there is a shortage of negril stories on this board....fess up.....
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Post by nycfeat on Feb 8, 2006 19:16:47 GMT -5
So far, I have not heard of any entries to "the hankus jamaican escape" contest for 2006.... what's up with that? my ears are to the ground for mythmaking among the feathful. come on folks, there is a shortage of negril stories on this board....fess up..... After the winner of 2006 is chosen, we should vote on which of the 3 (2006, 2005, or 200?) is the best story.
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Post by big little brother on Feb 8, 2006 22:14:01 GMT -5
I need some help with ""the hankus jamaican escape" contest for 2006". Please educate me. What is a "hankus"?
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Post by featphoto on Feb 8, 2006 22:23:29 GMT -5
I need some help with ""the hankus jamaican escape" contest for 2006". Please educate me. What is a "hankus"? I is ... it refers to an encounter I had (along with 3 co-conspirators) with the Jamaican police during the 1st Feat Jamaican weekend ... it involved a trip to Nine Mile (Bob Marley's home & resting place), some business transacted with the local rastafari farmers, an unfortunate roadblock and subsequent discussions of jail time, and the payment of a "fine" with our freedom restored (as was all of the confiscated, er, vegetal material) and a hearty "you have a good day mon" from our friends with the automatic weapons. after Denny found out about our adventure, I was drafted as the poster boy for the warning, "don't leave the compound, you can get anything you need from the staff, and we do mean anything". it was a helluva day, to say the least ...
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mg
Full Member
Posts: 117
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Post by mg on Feb 8, 2006 22:28:07 GMT -5
The Hankus is a tall Northeastern creature (feared by some, adored by others) who first flaunted the HMFIC edict of "don"t go off the property". His tale can be told around the Feat campfire and will never pass into obscurity. Writing it down only makes it more legendary. With all respect, grasshopper brother, you'll need a old featfan to tell you the story and its permutations ...then you can hear about the Hayes escapade of '05...
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Post by Mike on Feb 8, 2006 23:25:45 GMT -5
...then you can hear about the Hayes escapade of '05...
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Post by big little brother on Feb 9, 2006 7:15:22 GMT -5
I am truly eager to hear the stories.
I suspect the first one may have been a set up from the start. "OK mon, the tourists have left my place, set up your road block!"
The Jamaicans are truly an entreprenuerial bunch!
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Post by featphoto on Feb 9, 2006 8:15:49 GMT -5
I suspect the first one may have been a set up from the start. "OK mon, the tourists have left my place, set up your road block!" that's what we thought as well ...
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Post by Scott Hays on Feb 9, 2006 12:37:13 GMT -5
Personally, and in the bigger picture of things, I think Hank's adventure was more traumatic than Helen's and mine ... but at the time ...
Ours involved hiring a Grand Lido driver for the day. Our intention was to go off to the "real" Jamaica in order to obtain colorful photographs of the natives for an artistic friend of ours in Big Sur, and to possibly purchase her an "authentic" shawl (or something). We were in an official Grand Lido bus, our driver (Gentry)was almost seven feet tall, and we weren't doing any stinking "sneaking about" ... I think we stuck out like a sore thumb. Anyway ... he took us to Sav-la-Mar, around on the south coast. Events transpired to frustrate our driver ... road construction, untimely detours, increasing traffic, blocked access, mounting time ... until he took a shortcut and drove the wrong way on a one-way street. Right into the upraised palm of a female police officer with an attitude. She accused him of many things in an increasingly hostile voice, and he grew angrier and angrier. Most of what they said was spoken in the local tongue, and impossible for us to understand ... but the tones were angry, then agitated, and then they were screaming at each other. Essentially, she accused him of trying to acquire various illegal substances and/or activities for us. The argument escalated, he got out of the car, then back in, rolled up windows and locked doors ... she called reinforcements ... the argument continued with a rather burly male officer and 2-3 assistants. Our driver refused to accompany them and leave us stranded in the bus, but instead voluntarily drove to a local station deep in the heart of Sav-la-mar, where the argument again escalated and he was cuffed and tossed physically into the holding tank. We had to wait in a central courtyard of the jail until someone from the hotel drove to Sav-la-mar with papers and a pledge that he would appear in court ... about 2.5 hours later. We got to hang with some of south Jamaica's finest while we waited (a toothless woman became quite agitated that we were sitting on what looked like an abandoned desk ... an officer quieted her by bringing out two chairs, but we never found out what offensive thing we had done). Then Gentry drove us back, after he was released.
As a postscript ... we saw him driving a truck at the resort this year ... he wouldn't/couldn't accept a drink from us, but we laughed about everything ... guess everything worked out okay for him, too.
So ... as you see ... it wasn't us being accosted by the police, as it was Hank, which is why I think his adventure still is the overall winner. Nevertheless, if you had asked me how much fun I was having at any time from the moment the policewoman raised her hand to stop Gentry until he started the bus to take us back to the hotel, I would have just looked at you with a blank stare.
Like Melissa, I haven't heard of anyone having an off-campus adventure ... maybe this is because several "group" off-campus tours and/or activities were included as options this year?
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Post by big little brother on Feb 9, 2006 17:06:03 GMT -5
Getting obstinate or angry when confronted with a cop from any country is definitely a bad idea.
When travelling in an area of known police corruption (most of latin america and much of the caribbean), and you are have been stopped in a situation where a search would be...troublesome...you can try this play:
with a big smile "officer we are so glad to see you, perhaps you can help us?"
"we have so enjoyed your kind hospitality here in XXXX, and were hoping to express our gratitude by contributing to a local charity, but my friend here has become ill with we think travellers disease, and we are eager to get back to our resort as quickly as possible."
"could you possibly recommend a charity and an appropriate gift, and deliver it for us so we can quickly return to our resort?"
...you will either pay the equivalent of hankus' fine, and return to your resort with purchases intact, or you may find yourself in even deeper sh*t!
I think I will continue to remain "on campus" except for planned excursions.
We did go for the combined shopping trip and Rick's outing. Our driver took us to his favorite store (Jamaican entrepreneurism at work again). There was very little of interest, and Rick's was a little "touristy", but the divers made it somewhat worth while.
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Post by bigjoe on Feb 14, 2006 13:00:32 GMT -5
Enjoying the comments about being "off property", and the hankus incident certainly sounds spooky! I went into Negril for a couple of days after the first week end, for the purpose of seeing the "real Jamaica", and I wasn't disappointed. Staying at the Blue Cave Castle was very nice (and cheap!), and I got a chance to wander about some, looking for good eats and local color. Based on just two days of wandering, I must say I didn't feel intimidated too much; once with an over aggressive panhandler, and once in the local "crafts" market, with a VERY aggressive "artiste". I just kept my eyes open, and didn't go anyplace that looked the least bit hinky. "Found" a wonderful little roadside cafe, the "Brown Sugar Restaurant", great food, wonderful people. I will say that walking along that stretch of road was a little dangerous, but again, keep your eyes open. The trip to Treasure Beach/Black River was wonderful, and the natives I talked to on that trip seemed to be more laid back than Negril. The driver back to Mo' Bay, Troy, spoke rather eloquently of how the government is trying to educate their people on the benefit of not spooking the tourists! They know they need sidewalks; they know they can't put the tourist in an uncomfortable position, or they won't come back! I would rate my off-property experience as a B+; I intend to make it a little longer next year, maybe on the South Coast. Great job with that trip, Andy!
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Post by big little brother on Feb 14, 2006 14:43:57 GMT -5
bigjoe's post has me thinking the other way now about off site excursion. That kind of experience with the local restaurants and such I could really get into. Maybe for my third year...or maybe tied into the idea of a trip to Kingston.
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Post by simone on Feb 17, 2006 13:12:33 GMT -5
Dear other little brother,
I also little brother who is 6'7". And I remember you and your wife well. I was in charge of guarding the beach chair on the patio almost directly behind the naked bar. Apparently, I was the most qualified person for the job. I will, however, blame you, if I see big lineups in front of the coffee pot next year. Say hi to the other big sister for me...
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